Many teens who are plagued with low self-esteem and self-worth believe that this is a permanent state of mind. But as I will discuss in this article, low self-esteem isn’t a permanent state of mind. So, we have no need to identify with it.
Most teens who experience low self-esteem believe that they are plagued with this condition forever as if it is some disease. Some even feel so awkward and frustrated because of low self-esteem that they seek out counselling and other guidance. However, this need not be the case if you consider low self-esteem situational and short-term.
Most of us experience low self-esteem from time to time. However, very few of us are defined by our low self-esteem. Instead, we should view low self-esteem as something that comes and goes and that you can control instead of it controlling you all the time.
One way to ensure that you don’t get overwhelmed when you experience low self-esteem and you feel vulnerable is to remove yourself from the immediate situation that is making you feel low and go to a place where you can center. You have all the resources that you need within you.
To center, you should take a few deep breaths and then preferably sit down alone, without your Blackberry and listen to your breath. Then close your eyes and focus on your breath. Breathe deeply. Then start counting your breaths. When you get to ten, start over at one. Keep doing this for a few minutes. Then stop counting your breaths and just relax in this space of calm.
Then open your eyes, and sit quietly for a few minutes. Ask yourself how you feel now. Do you feel as low as you did a few minutes ago? Did you have low self-esteem while you were meditating? Psychologists firmly believe that the practise of relaxing with your breath can reduce a lot of negative self-talk which leads to low self-esteem.
So, if you catch yourself experiencing low self-esteem and self-worth, here are a few tips to follow.
• As soon as you notice that your negative self-talk has sucked you into a vortex of low self-esteem and self-worth, pause.
• Take a few deep breaths.
• Remove yourself from the immediate situation. If you are around a bunch of people, tell them that you have to leave for a few minutes.
• Do a short meditation session like the one outlined above.
• If you are still overwhelmed, go your own separate way for the rest of the day.
• Don’t keep rehearsing the negative situation in your mind. Instead, every time the situation replays itself in your mind, pause and take a few deep breaths. Then acknowledge that you had a negative thought and let the thought go. This will be hard to do at first, but once you master it, your self-esteem will be in tact regardless of what others say and do to you.
By taking these steps, you will be taking control of your health, happiness and well-being. And you won’t be dependent on other people being nice to you all the time. You will be nice to yourself, and that will be within your control. That is one way to build self-esteem.